Bang Crunch by Neil Smith

The collection opens with Isolettes and the arresting line 

Blue tube, green tube, clear tube, fat tube.

However, perhaps the author is not sure enough either of his own voice, or of the reader's ability to get it, so follows up with A Dr Seuss rhyme. Yes, thanks, got that. Never mind, he continues with an image of a premature baby that is so entirely unexpected and yet spot on, that I was astonished. That is just the opening page. 

There is so much here, sometimes too much. The text of Isolettes is thick with puns: 

Nick U Nick off 

The pent-up suite 

If marriage is an institution married people should be institutionalised. 

Pushing through though is a tender understanding for character that gives heart to this and the majority of the other stories. 

Green fluorescent protein is a bittersweet tale about a 17-year-old boy coming to terms with his sexuality. At home his alcoholic mother talks to the ashes of his dead father, at play Ruby-Doo, the skinny bookish science fan he befriends, confuses his feelings. There are more of Smith s accurate descriptions: 

…Ruby-Doo does the fake crowd roar – the hushed wahhhh – I taught him. 

These are people that we meet again in Funny weird or funny ha ha? and whilst I am a huge fan of the short story form it felt like there was such warmth and depth to this trio of unusual characters that I would welcome reading a novel about them. The B9ers are a support group for people who have had benign tumours. Bang Crunch is the story of the extraordinary Eepie Carpetrod, whose rare syndrome makes her live her life in fast forward, aging rapidly, racing towards death. 

Occasionally it seemed to me that Smith thought of a witty phrase and then wrote a paragraph around it.Extremities is an idea that failed in my opinion as he writes of gloves that yearn for a particular hand, and a talking foot. 

The last story, Jaybird is also the longest. It centres on a group of Montreal-based actors. Benoit Doré, a man whose "…laid-back look was a lie. His mussed-up hair came courtesy of a mud putty that had set him back twelve bucks", mentors a woman who works at an agency looking after actors' interests, and she uses the opportunity to take revenge on her clients. The story twists nastily along and I read, wincing. At the end though, there is much needed possibility and hope. Like so many collections, the quality is up and down according to the strength of individual stories, but this is a good introduction to Neil Smith, and I look forward to reading more of him.

(I wrote this piece for The Short Review)

Matt Kinnison 1965 - 2008

Love, loss.

Matt Kinnison died on May 7^th.

My world is a much lonelier place.

He was a musician of enormous, astounding, jaw dropping talent; seriously amazing with whichever instrument he chose to play (Bass, Trumpet Marine, Yayli Tanbur…) He was in bands (Bunty Chunks, Cindytalk), but also worked alone (His beautiful album of Yayli Tanbur “Evenings of ordinary sand” is due to be released.)

Music was his passion and focus, but he was multi talented, had creativity in abundance, and was also an artist, and a writer.

He took great care and time over all his work. He designed his cd sleeves, handmade birthday cards, penned elaborate hieroglyphs and strange cartoons, he made his own wrapping paper, scanned images that caught his eye.

He was sharply smart, uncompromising, stubborn, and hilarious.

He loved coffee possibly more than anyone else ever. He drank so much of it (from beans that he ground himself) it was ludicrous. He was also keen on dinosaurs, buns, soft toys, elephants, robots, komodo dragons, Lindt chocolate and The Hoobs.

He was an intellectual who managed to get hooked on “Neighbours” for a while.

He was very stiff upper lip, but sang songs to his toys.

He was super polite, but could be ultra withering.

I love words, and his, spoken and written, were extraordinary. Emails from him were a joy: lengthy, thoughtful, fiercely funny and witty. He had a real way with words: as clichéd as that phrase is, for him it rings true.

We had a joint Live Journal for which he occasionally wrote bonkers pieces that made readers who didn’t realise that we were 2 different people assume I had lost the plot.

I also had him open a Facebook account, just so that we could play scrabulous. He became rather addicted to it; we often had a couple of games on the go. We still have two unfinished.

He had a pain in his shoulder which got increasingly severe. The doctors thought it could be a strain. We assumed it was too much time hunched over that bass. They sent him for physio, acupuncture, blood tests galore. It took them several months before they discovered it was in fact a tumour on his lung. He endured radiotherapy and chemo. Then more pain. The cancer was aggressive and fast, it invaded his bones. 

I thought we had more time, but it all sped up. 

He was so supportive of me, my life, my writing, he was my very own cheer squad. He was insightful, helpful, and generous. 

I really wanted to try to honour him here, but I have no words for this loss, this ache. 

He was truly unique, quite eccentric, and it was a real privilege to be his friend.

In one of his emails he told me that “We must clang on, sad faced or not.” And he is right, we must. But I am so sad faced, and so sad hearted. 

He has been part of my life for over twenty years, it is going to be very strange without him.

I will miss him always.

Rest in peace and in love Matt. 

X

Don't forget!

I was tagged last week by Kay Sexton

She was asked by Patti Abbott to nominate a title as a Forgotten Book. Or as Patti herself said of the idea "This is the first of what I optimistically hope will become Friday recommendations of books we love but might have forgotten over the years. I have asked several people to help me by also remembering a favorite book. I also asked each of them to tag someone to recommend a book for next Friday. I'm worried great books of the recent past are sliding out of print and out of our consciousness. Not the first-tier classics we all can name, but the books that come next. "

 I choose 'The trick is to keep breathing' by Janice Galloway.

It's a wonderful book describing a woman's grief and unravelling life. It feels familiar and yet illuminates with such precision that it astonishes me. It melds wit with empathy and employs trailing sentences and playful typography that all work towards the creation of a very 'real' character in Joy (ho ho).

I was deeply moved when I first read it, and still feel surprised that it doesn't seem to have the recognition it deserves. Galloway is a superb writer who inspires me greatly.

I get to play tag now, so next Friday I will be very interested to read which book Kirsty recommends us.

The Frank O'Connor International Short Story Award longlist announced.

I am delighted to see Vanessa Gebbie's beautiful debut short story collection "Words from a glass bubble" is on the longlist for this most prestigious award. 

And congratulations to Alison MacLeod whose inspirational Fifteen Modern Tales of Attraction is also longlisted.

Simultaneous submissions

There is a post at Literary Rejections On Display regarding the policy that many literary magazines have on not accepting simultaneous submissions. It is something I have been pondering now that I'm trying to be proactive and get my fiction out into the big wide world.

I am quite obedient, so when I see the rules of subs and they state that I have to agree to give them exclusivity on viewing, well, I abide by it. I send my precious piece in, and I wait to hear if they like it or not. If so, ace, if not, then I go to my next choice. Of course this means that if they respond quickly it's fine, but not all magazines are so swift. Elimae  ♥ responded almost immediately with a rejection, and then with an acceptance, but they are the exception. I have been waiting a few months on responses for a couple of stories, and I may well wait a few more. In that time those stories are out of action, and in  all probability they aren't sitting in a file having been read on receipt and now being considered, they are likely to be in a huge pile that one day someone will whizz through and send form rejections back on. 

So, let's think this through, I have spent time and care writing something that I hope will be accepted by a magazine and published. Lots of these 'zines do not pay me a penny for my work. I am meant to be grateful that they will display my words. I am grateful. But when they "sit" on my story for ages before tossing it back to me they are disrespecting me, and every other writer that they do that too. If I know from experience that a mag is likely to take its time, is it fair enough to send my work elsewhere too?

Apparently most writers do just that.

Writer's Market UK 2009

Writer's Market commissioned me to write an article for their 2009 edition. (It was one of those exciting things I didn't want to talk about in case I somehow jinxed it!) It has now been published and is available in all good bookshops ( Waterstones)

Writer's Market UK 2009

It was quite weird to go to work and see a pile of these in our reference section and know that I'm in it!

Tagged twice in one day, so it's mememememememe

I was tagged by Kirsty at Other Stories.

These are her rules:

• Link to the person that tagged you - i.e. me.
• Post the rules on your blog.
• Write six random things about you in a blog post.
• Tag six people in your post.
• Let each person know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
• Let the tagger know your entry is up.

So, being obedient here are my six random things.

1 - The first concert I ever went to was Barry Manilow at The Royal Albert Hall. 

2 - BBQ is my favoured flavour, and at the moment I am particularly partial to BBQ Snack-a-Jacks.

3 - I saw a ghost about six weeks ago, but because I don't believe in ghosts I am trying not to think about it.

4 - I find it hard to write random facts about myself.

5 - I recently wore a different perfume for the first time in fifteen years (I usually wear Penhaligan's Bluebell but bought Valentino's Rock and Rose, crap name, rather lovely scent.) 

6 - I will never drive.

Right, so I tag six people and they will be:

Tania

Vanessa

Kellie

Mark

Steerforth

Jessica

On to memememememe 2

Tania Hershman says

1. Pick up the nearest book.
2. Open to page 123
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people, and acknowledge who tagged you.

Okay...hmm, well the nearest book is not one that I am reading as that is upstairs by my bed, and there's another in the bathroom. Taking this incredibly literally I walk to my bookcase and pick up the book closest:

Granta - Best of British Novelists 2003 (I do have more current editions, but they aren't so near.)

The Costa Pool Bums by Alan Warner

Page 123, fifth sentence says:

 "We leaned forward in the sky as the undercarriage and full flaps were rammed down. Our engine whined smartly and floated us briefly upwards.

The hazy air now revealed the uniform, dull sheen of the deep black Mediterranean visible between the drooped flaps; sun glazed the aluminium wing, its central wing duller and doubtless cheaper to produce than the frictionless boss of the dazzling leading edge."

Which leads to yet more tagging.

I'm going to tag Pierre L, who doesn't use his blog I don't think? If he chooses he can post in the comments here (no escape!)

And

Vanessa

Kellie

Kirsty

Kerry

(Three K's, has to be Kool, hahahah etc)