Vanessa Gebbie's competition.

Vanessa Gebbie has put up details of a competition that she is hosting on her site.
http://vanessagebbiesnews.blogspot.com/

"HOW TO BUILD A MAN" COMPETITION

I'll give a £25.00 PRIZE to the best short story inspired by Alison Dunne's poem, How to Build a Man.

It must be unpublished, your own work, and under 1250 words.

The winner will be published on here for a week or two. Then I'll take it down if the writer wants.

Closing date: Monday 2nd April.

Post your stories here, by posting a comment. They won't appear immediately... as I moderate the posts. But all stories posted will appear, and be readable by everyone, so long as they dont contravene any blogger rules, and so long as they seem serious entries...whenever I manage to get to a computer during the next week. You can also post comments on the stories.

You can post as many entries as you like. Those who work hardest have more chances to win. Seems fair, doesn't it?

If you don't like the idea of posting here, you can email the entries to me

vrgebbie AT aol DOT com

Passs the word round. Or alternatively, if you want more chances of winning, don't pass the word round, and write twenty stories yourself.

Searching for the dazzle.

I approach things in an optimistic fashion I think. When I pick up a book to read, or settle down to watch a film or TV show, or play music, I am hoping to be absorbed and delighted. I want it to be great, really, that's what I am rooting for.
It seems ages since I have been dazzled. Even with the decent stuff I start out thinking ooh, this is good, which peters out into, well, it's not so bad, before it finishes and I think, oh.
Veronica Mars ( yeah, on and on I go about VM) was great, I was impressed throughout by plot, dialogue, acting, dammit, I even liked the clothes! But that's it. That's the sum total of me being impressed this year so far. Sigh.
So what is that about? Am I old and jaded and way too fussy, is there a dearth of dazzle, is it my hormones?
Every book of short stories at work seem to come with some proclamation that this author is the best writer of his/her generation, and is endorsed by x, y and z authors who all agree that here is rare talent. And I flip open the book and read blah stories that leave me cold. I don't know what I am looking for but I'll know it when I see it. I can't write it either, it's what I want to write and read and watch and hear, for now it is utterly elusive.

(Actually, it probably sounds a bit like Beth Ditto, and reads like Janice Galloway's "The trick is to keep breathing" and looks like Veronica Mars...seen it anywhere?)

Stern words work!

After my disgusted outburst at myself yesterday I am pleased to report that I managed to write a (very short flash) story last night. Woot!

Writers should write right?

It's the fundamental thing isn't it. A writer should write, if a writer is not writing then THEY'RE NOT A FUCKING WRITER.
Which makes me;
A procrastinating waffling blog hound forum haunter internet loser time wasting liar.
Arse.

Channel 4 news weirdness.

In the middle of their story about how Andrew Flintoff got drunk and had to be rescued from a dinghy, Channel 4 news flashed up a cartoon dinghy picture with a cartoon Andrew Flintoff waggling his head about whilst surrounded by cartoon bottles of alcohol. Channel 4 news! It was like something from one of those mock ups trashy papers sometimes do where they print in teeny letters "this is what **** may have looked like when doing ****"
Very odd.

The bookshop.

In the paper a journalist states that an independent bookshop (X) is a successful example of a good bookshop, and goes on to complain that a chain book store (Y) will be dumbing down and culling its already limited stock further to make way for more chick lit and sleb biogs. She says
"When a bookshop works, there is really nothing quite like it - and X works. As an independent, it cannot compete with the big chains on advertising or discounts. So it has come up with other, more subtle strategies to bring in customers. Its staff, for instance, are passionate and knowledgeable."
And of course that implies that Y's staff are not. Yeah, yeah, I'm biased, but truly the booksellers I work with are all kinds of ace. Seriously, you have to care about books to sell them right, it's not a get rich kinda job, it's a choice made by full timer's because they heart books. I am lucky that the branch I work in is full of quirky, non-mainstream delicious books, as well as the usual offers and current best sellers. Well it'd be pretty shit if we didn't stock the popular stuff too eh? I am sure that the journalist can't possibly be referring to a shop like ours when she bemoans
"If you're the kind of person who walks into a bookshop hoping to stumble on as yet unknown treasures that you just won't be able to resist buying, you'd better forget it."
because that is exactly the kind of store that we are. It's a pleasure to browse the store even as a bookseller. I only go in at the week end and there are always fab new titles, intriguing older books and so on. In addition to the stock we have we will order any book that is available for you, or you can order it on-line from our www address. No, all the books in the world do not fit under one roof. Whoo, surprise.
I did work in another shop a few years back that was originally staffed by cool individuals who had a mix of passion and knowledge that the manager was happy to reflect in the stock. Then the manager went to a bigger store, and the new manager was someone for whom books were just a commodity, and the job a stepping stone. The book loving staff left for other branches or new things, and the manager employed people she could easily manage. She didn't have the confidence in her own abilities to employ sassy intelligent people who could challenge her. She employed drones who would memorise those best sellers, and yet not read any of the books and therefore not be able to comment on, or recommend. That's an issue of mis-management, not a problem where I now am where the manager is an awesome woman.
I don't know why I am even bothering to comment on this at all. There is no need for me to do so, nothing to gain from me sitting here on my little blog blathering about it, but I guess that really, it pisses me off that a journalist I like, with a huge readership, makes such a crappy statement in my favourite Sunday paper. And having passionate knowledgeable staff isn't a subtle strategy for fucks sake, it's the basic rule in book shops all over.

EDIT. I removed the journalist and books shop names, purely to stop someone at work from finding my blog by googling those words after having had a discussion with them today. It's just a colleague, who I do like, but who I don't wish to share my blog revelations with.

3 for 2's

If you went into a bookshop and they offered you a free book from a selection of 150 assorted titles you'd take one right? Who wouldn't? I simply can't conceive of not being pleased to get a free book. Every single day at work someone will come to the counter and I will kindly inform them that as 2 of the books they are purchasing are part of our 3 for 2 offer they are entitled to select a free book. Sometimes they will be happy, they will thank me for telling them, we will smile, I will patiently put their other book choices to one side as they take the time to enjoy choosing a book FOR FREE. Sometimes they will be a bit startled, they feel forced into making an on the spot decision. In that case I reassure them that they can take their time and it's not any problem at all. Sometimes they say they don't know what to pick, I will happily advise them, find out what they like and suggest one. But sometimes they say
"I don't want one."
And I just don't get it. Surely, even if they are the kind of person who only buys 2 books a year and doesn't even read them, they must have a friend or family member or someone who they could give a book to as a gift. It would cost them nothing. Grr. I am very broke at the moment, and there are several books in the current offer that I really want to read, what if I scanned them through as the third book and kept them. That would be cool. I assume however that it is WRONG to do such a thing, so of course won't. I like my job, I aim to keep it so will continue to silently curse at the people who don't want a FREE BOOK.

Dear people who like books...

I have been reminded that the British Book Awards (the Galaxy British Book Awards to be exact) are taking place very soon. The shortlists were announced yesterday, and a right mixed bunch they are too.

The fun part is that you can vote for your own particular faves, and it will only take a few moments of your time. Not only do you get to have your say, but you might win some book tokens too. Hurrah.
http://surveys.bookmarketing.co.uk/awardsvote.htm

I think that the inclusion of popular lit chicky stuff etc may well put some off. It's not your usual literary list after all. I am soooo guilty of incredible snobbishness when it comes to the books and writers I love, but I AM WRONG TO BE THAT WAY. I read Nick Hornby's "Complete Polysyllabic spree"

http://www.waterstones.com/waterstonesweb/displayProductDetails.do?sku=3892754
and he cured me of my stinky attitude. Reading is good, it should be fun, my fun is not necessarily your fun, your favourite writer not mine and so on. If a person derives pleasure from a book that's a great thing. Lately I have been listening to Elvis, and I have been astounded by his range, depth and power. I am currently reading Raymond Carver, and his stories are wonderful. Both of these men are hugely popular, neither anywhere near being crap. Popular is defined in the dictionary as meaning "regarded with great favour, approval, or affection especially by the general public", not such a bad thing eh? Dan Brown is still shit though, not that he's anywhere in this years lists, I just felt like saying!

Veronica Mars.

Just about the only thing bringing me joy right now is Veronica Mars. Living have been repeating series 1 and 2 daily for the last few weeks, and it is ultra delicious. The writing is uber snappy and funny, but there are also those quiet vulnerable moments too. I think the actors are doing a really good job, and yeah, I want to be Veronica and snog Logan, sigh. The great thing about the show is the way it has an amazingly complex story arc, and it doesn't fuck up with it ever. I am a huge Buffy and Angel fan, Joss is my man, I came to VM with a huge amount of scepticism. I thought it would be Buffy lite and I'd hate it. But no, I LOVE it. I read today that Joss Whedon said it was the " Best. Show. Ever. Seriously, I've never gotten more wrapped up in a show I wasn't making, and maybe even more than those. Crazy crisp dialogue. Incredibly tight plotting. Big emotion, I mean BIG, and charismatic actors and I was just DYING from the mystery and the relationships and PAIN" (caps all his.)
So now I feel vindicated in my adoration. In fact JW guest starred in the episode I watched last night, and I didn't realise until afterwards.
Anyhoo, I have been finding books fairly disappointing recently, I haven't reviewed what I have read because I don't want to just slag off somebody's hard work. I'm working to the adage if you have nothing nice to say then say nothing so I'm keeping schtum about my feelings towards several current hot novels. They were all dull. If only one could transfer some of that VM magic onto paper, whoo, that'd be ace. But how hard is it to write characters as complicated as Logan? I honestly don't know if it is possible. All I can say is that amidst my pile of notes for my novel is a line saying "VM and the year long story arc."